Despite my best intentions, I tend to get side tracked. Probably my Ravenclaw nature. ‘Oh, pretty shiny’, and I am gone. I have tried to keep on task with the Alice story, really, I have. But then I may have sat down and written a 4,000 word first draft of a story that has absolutely nothing to do with Alice.
I love foxes, and I love myths. The point where the two intersect in the Japanese lore is the kitsune. While some see foxes as irritants as they are known to attack livestock (like chickens in logic puzzles), the Japanese have a quite different view of them. They treat them nice as they could bring good luck. Foxes act as messengers of the fertility goddess Inari, and they have the ability to transform in people. Not many cultures have a favorable view of foxes, so I took up this particular myth as a favorite readily. I checked out different stories about them time and again, but my short story about kitsune just suddenly burst out of me one night. I’ve been known to do odd things, but even I wasn’t expecting that.
In addition to completely going on a story telling tangent, I made the mistake of taking a small look over that novel that I am avoiding. I soon found that this was a big, big mistake. I immediately noticed that I had missing scenes. I panicked and of course tore through the depths of my computer, using search to help find where they might have been. They weren’t there. Did I imagine writing up these scenes? Was I loosing my mind? No, no, no. Don’t forget handwriting. To the notebooks! Luckily, I found the right notebook after only looking at three. Lucky me.
Then I spent two whole days just typing up those notes. I am not even half way done typing up this notebook, but I have found that I can type them up in my sleep. It may have been three in the morning when I realized I was still typing, alright? I don’t really remember much of the typing session, but I have some how managed to get a good 4,000 words done. Woo!
Despite the good work, I still can’t help feeling like I am loosing focus again. I intentionally stopped working on the novel series I have because it was breaking my brain and felt more like work rather than just enjoying where it was going. I decided to work on short stories so I wouldn’t feel over whelmed, still keep writing, and get a few things done. I am ignoring those stories and leaving them half finished too. Urg. There is no better feeling than that of the accomplishment of finishing a story, but I can’t even seem to get myself together enough to finish something. My beta just finished writing a short story that she keeps calling mine because I was the one who told her to write it after a three hour phone call listening to it! (Go beta! You win a gold star for this week.)
Earlier this week, I was so annoyed by my lack of willingness to work on those short stories, and how I kept letting myself run on tangents. Today, after typing those scenes for the novel series, I find myself amused because it finally hit me that the problem that was the problem is the answer to the new problem.
How is this my life? I’m not sure at this point if I am making tracks in the wrong direction or finally back in the right direction. I think maybe I need to take a look back at my goals and making some proper schedules of what to do when, and put it on a real calendar. I never seem to get that far, and a word count to hit doesn’t seem to be doing as much as I hoped. It is a third of the way into the year now. It’s okay to take the time to look over and refocus my goals. I feel like I lost sight of the goal, so I think over the next two weeks I am going to work on game planning. Luckily, I have notebooks that need typing so I can at least keep my word counts up!
Love and Lightning,